Friday 14 February 2020

God is changing me.

It's February! The month that means we got through January, the month in which I turn 18 and get to go see Prince of Egypt on the West End. In fact, today is valentines day, and I am spending it with no one other than my true love, Jesus. I had the house to myself for about an hour this morning and I spent it praying, worshipping and cleaning while listening to a podcast by the BibleProject. Once the others got back, I had some lunch and carried on spending time in the Lord's presence by writing in my 'journey with God' book.

These past 2 weeks have been so good. Nothing particularly special has happened, in fact, I've been doing exams, but God's spirit has been with me and I've felt it every day from the moment I've woken up to the moment I've gone to sleep.
Last week in Rooted we had a really good discussion about prayer and it helped me to examine myself and my prayer life, I found myself speaking to myself as I was answering others and talking to other people. Last Sunday was a great one. In the morning as well, my dad was preaching about Fasting. This week our church is taking a week of fasting -  from whatever God calls us to fast - and my dad was preaching on what is fasting, why do we fast and how do we fast. This week as I have been preparing to fast, I have prayed more than normal, I've read my bible more than I usually do, and I've read a devotional about prayer every single morning for the past 6 days. Every single day, God has spoken right into my thoughts and heart through his word and the devotional I'm reading. This past week I have felt God's presence like I never have before and I keep thinking about why I haven't devoted myself to the word like this before. I'm stupid that's why. No, but seriously, I started writing my prayers down and it has made a significant difference to my prayer life. Also, the more I pray, the more I find myself praying, it's crazy. Something my dad quoted in rooted last week when we were talking about prayer, is that we should "pray until we pray". Meaning we should pray until we find ourselves praying in the spirit, praying because the spirit is guiding our prayers. This quote has also changed my prayer, I find myself praying for longer because I don't ever want to stop.

To be honest, I don't really know where I'm going with this, I just wanted to write about what's been going on the past few weeks. My exams, I think, went really well, I did the best I could and now I leave it in God's hands. I have two weeks off for work experience and half term and then I'm back for the next part of my course which mostly contains course work. I'm excited about what the next part of the year holds and excited for what God's going to do. This week, I've really been focusing on God and I hope that over the next few weeks, I don't stop focusing on God and that I only grow closer and more intimate with him.

My prayer for anyone reading this is that they are inspired and encouraged to pray. It really does make a difference, even if you don't have much hope or faith, God listens and he will answer, even if it isn't how you expect.
Thanks for reading.

BeeBee
xxx