Last post of the Year I guess

I'm back at Uni! My first term is coming to an end already! When I first arrived back it was definitely weird. There were so many things that were familiar, the campus, the town, the teachers and peers. But, there were also still so many things that were new. A house full of new people, the routine, and even I feel like a new person a little bit. I grew so much last year. Everything was fresh, from the classes and teachers to the drinking and going out. I had yet to work out the balance of everything; assignments, social life and my faith. I went through quite a spiritual transformation last year, bringing me into this year with a fresh mindset about everything. Not only that but over the summer I got baptised and was a Limitless Festival volunteer. I believe both got me out of my comfort zone and were real encouragements and strengtheners for my faith.

Limitless Festival was incredible. It was an awakening for this generation and the longing that this world has for a connection with Jesus and his Holy Spirit. The teachings were terrific and the whole event helped us to listen, wait and connect with the spirit of Jesus. A lot of the nights we would sit in silence just waiting. Waiting on the Lord to move and speak. It was such an encouragement to see the Lord move in these moments among the young people. The testimonies I've heard of the Lord speaking to people during that week are incredible. I got to be a part of a team that helped 480 people respond to the gospel and give their lives to Jesus. 

This first term has been a struggle. I am enjoying it, my lessons are fun and more focused on the animal areas that I am interested in (except research methods, eew ugh). At the end of October/beginning of November, I was really having a hard time focusing on assignments. Every time I would open one I would just wanna shut off and cry, I was fully ready to quit. I know this probably just sounds like what every university student goes through, and it probably is, but I'm talking about it anyway. All my life I have wanted to study animals and work with them, I have never wanted to do anything else. But, in November I really started to question whether it was something I wanted to do or even something I can do, like am I actually capable or am I just gonna fail. I was having an identity crisis! I lost passion for everything, I started to think about the fact that if I did quit, I would have no idea what else I am good at, maybe I'm not good at anything! It was really depressing and very unmotivating because I just kept thinking that I am not capable, maybe I'm just stupid and I suck and I don't know anything! To be honest, I still don't think there is anything else I could do apart from animal management, I think it's the only skill I could pursue a career in (just about). However, my thoughts of being a massive failure have begun to fade with prayer. As always, the Lord was there to pick me up. As much as I thought about quitting and giving up on my lifelong pursuit, the Lord equally reminded me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, His ways are better than my ways. He reminded me of his promises for me and told me to keep on the path towards Him and I will not fail. Slowly, I began to cast my cares upon the Lord. I reminded myself of things learnt at Limitless Festival and how we must wait on the Lord and wait with the Lord. He restored my strength. I found motivation again. Although one of the assignments still makes me wanna cry, it doesn't make me want to quit. The Lord also encouraged me through my sisters and through new-found friends. Having a community is just so much better than wallowing by yourself. 

To my sister who probably isn't reading this. Thanks for reminding me of the hope Christmas brings. You may have been being a bit silly, but when you said to just put the word 'Christmas' in front of everything, it actually really encouraged me. When you told me to think about them as 'Christmas' assignments (assignments due before Christmas, "Completing them will be a Christmas present to yourself, they're Christmas assignments"). It actually made me feel better and reminded me that Jesus is the hope of Christmas and when I am sticking 'Christmas' in front of everything, I am reminded that we must do all things for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31). Christmas was all about bringing glory to God, so why shouldn't my assignments and work be for the glory of God. So, thank you for encouraging me and bringing me Hope when I was feeling down and stressed. 

That same morning, I met someone at church that goes to my uni and we got on straight away. I thank the Lord, that both years, he has gifted me a friend that I may share in the glory of God with. 

As I write this, it is literally 10 minutes until the first of December, and I am listening to Crowder's new Christmas Album and eating cake. I am filled with hope and motivation for the future and filled with the Christmas spirit. Without my family around me, it is hard to feel the Christmas spirit, but this week I have really been trying to choose to spend more time in the Lord's presence and that is enough to fill me with the joy, peace and hope that Christmas is.

Thanks for reading as always. If you're feeling down I hope this encouraged you in some way. I pray you too find the hope that the celebration of Jesus' birth brings. 

Merry Christmas!

BeeBee

xxx

I leave you with these Christmas vibes

We've made it this far, we can make it further.

The World is dying, but I have hope! I know that might be a bit of a depressing way to start this blog, but I wanted to let you know, whoever is reading this, that the world may feel as though it is ending, which it probably is, but God is still on the throne. We may not understand why any of this is happening, I can admit that I am a little annoyed at God that this is happening, but He knows what he is doing, he knows that we can make it through this otherwise he wouldn't have put us through this. There is still hope. Don't lose hope, help is on the way.

So, what have I been doing to get through this time of uncertainty as we go back into yet another lockdown? Not much honestly, but I thought I'd share some art that I've done recently. We also did a bit of pumpkin carving. My cats are always the joy of my day, family time is always great, playing games, going on walks, getting coffee, watching movies together. Then apart from that, I've been binging some of my favorite shows on Netflix and feeling festive ready for the Christmas season.

 

 

 

 

I would love to hear about what you have been up to to get through these sucky times. Have you taken up a new hobby? Have you had zoom meetings with friends once a week? Or have you just been in bed watching your favorite shows to make you happy? Whatever it is, just know that it's one day at a time and we've survived this long.

I find myself having to remind myself that it is one day at a time because otherwise, I get super stressed and angry at the world. I don't need to worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. All that should matter is what I do with my time right now.

I praise God for getting me this far. He is the one who has been keeping me steady and actually enabling me to have the energy and motivation to get up each morning.

Anyway, I'm sort of rambling on now, I hope this has distracted you or entertained you for a minute or so. Thanks always for reading.

BeeBee

xxx

This is AN EXCITING THING!!!

 Wow, it's taken a lot to get here, but we have made it to the almost end of 2020! Only 3 months left.

I've talked about a lot that happened in August already. Our holiday was the main thing and then all the God stuff that I talked about in my last post. So, instead of doing a September update, I am going to write and show you something that has happened recently which is the most exciting thing that has happened in a while!!!

 

WE GOT KITTTEENNNSS!!!!! Like we didn't just get one, we got TWO GORGEOUS LOOKING KITTENS. 

We've had them for about 5 days and they are just too cute. I've taken way too many photos of them and spent a lot of time just staring at them sleeping because they are too gorgeous. The one photographed on the left is Alfie, who is the family cat and on the right is Prince Winston, my own cat. There isn't really much else to say about them so let me just spam you with photos instead.

 

 

 

  

 

Well that's is basically it. I don't really have anything else I haven't already written about. I'll be back the next time something happens.

BeeBee

xxx

Life in Lockdown part 4

Well, not much has changed since I last wrote, I've just been taking each day as it comes and not worrying about tomorrow. 

At the beginning of June God gave me Matthew 6:34 which reads "So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today" and this is just what I've been living by for the past month. It has just really helped me to chill out and enjoy each thing as I do it. Last month I spent several moments being still, doing nothing or sitting and listening to God. It was so peaceful and the moments that I have had with God in being still have been so amazing and God has taught me so much. I hope in this next month I only learn more.

So, what did I actually do in June? I mean not loads, but, more than any other month. As we are slowly getting out of lockdown I've been doing more things and seeing more people, but obviously only outside and still social distancing. It has been so good to talk and chat with other people that aren't my family, I mean I love my family, but I've missed other people. 

So on the 15th of June, we celebrated my mom's birthday by spending it walking around the beautiful Lake District to Grasmere

 

 

 

I spent June doing a lot of art, including my 30-day drawing challenge.

On the 24th we went to spend some time with the people who's bearded dragon we looked after last year. It was a really nice day, just sitting in the sun, cuddling their new baby chickens, and chatting about stuff.

  

To celebrate our friend Rachel's birthday a few of us went over to Wirral Country Park to just chill by the water for a bit. I also did some weird rock 'art', but I don't think you could call it art. However my little bro did make a boat out of stones which sadly I don't have a picture of, but it was cute.

 

Over the end of June I didn't do much, just spent more time painting, I even attempted a Bob Ross painting with my sisters and a friend over zoom. I also did some shopping and bought two maxi dresses which I absolutely love, but apart from that I didn't do much and July has just started so I really haven't been doing much. I'm gonna try read a few books this month. Maybe, as we come out of lockdown, I might start looking for jobs, but I don't know, I'm not worrying about it and trusting in God for each day.

This update wasn't that exciting I know, but if there is anything you want to see me talk about let me know in the comments because these lockdown updates will probably be over next month. 

Thanks for reading.

BeeBee

xxx